What Is Inner Work & Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared of It

black woman releasing in palm trees

If you’ve ever looked up and realized the life you are living feels nothing like the one you imagined yourself living you’re not alone. It’s  like you wake up one day and you feel lost, don’t know who you are anymore, and feel lonely like an outsider looking into the world. The reality is that we spend most of our lives attached to belief systems that we inherited that are not our own. We develop this picture in our heads about what our lives and success are supposed to look like. We move through life holding onto certain patterns of fear, doubt, uncertainty, abuse and judgement that eventually drain us as adults and become the root of our unhappiness, pain and struggles. And if you’re anything like I was, just pushing through and not acknowledging how you truly feel, you can easily find yourself in meltdown mode and desperately trying to get your life back on track.  Simply put, when you don’t pay attention to your inner self and what you want, the unhealed energies build up and your body and life start to manifest imbalances.

So how do we break free from the things that are draining us and holding us back so we can live a life filled with purpose, passion and potential? It requires turning inward and diving deep into your inner self for the purposes of self-exploration, self-understanding, healing, and transformation. In essence, the life you desire requires that you do your inner work. 

What Is Inner Work?

Doing inner work means taking the time to grow self awareness and clear out all the thoughts, feelings, memories, fears, perceptions, and doubts that negatively affect your daily life so you can move toward positive change. It’s a commitment to make peace with yourself, to keep growing, to keep evolving and to know if you keep doing that work, the universe will respond in kind. This is not a task for the faint or something you tackle for a week and then you’re done. Inner work is a life-long process. You truly have to commit yourself to going deep into the parts unknown, which is actually terrifying for most people. But taking the journey inward is the only way to get to know your truest self and step into the life you desire.

Why Am I Doing My Inner Work?

By the end of 2019, I could have been a poster child for what it looked like to need to do your inner work. I needed to break free from anything and everything that was holding me back so I could finally find peace, joy and the happiness I craved. I had spent my entire adult life trying to be “successful” by society’s standards in careers that made me money but didn’t make me happy, my relationship track record  was a mess and included a divorce, and fear, self-doubt, and low self-esteem had a strong arm on me like no tomorrow. The best life I was supposed to be living was not really what I was experiencing.

I thought that if I kept working harder and focusing on everything external, I could eventually get to my happy place and things would get better. But no matter what I tried, I couldn’t get it together. I pretty much threw my hands up at the end of last year, but not in the sense of giving up. I knew I had to try something different and decided to stop going against the grain and surrender. I needed to reflect on who I really was underneath my public persona. I needed to get down to the core of me and that’s where my healing journey began and I have been committed to my personal growth and transformation ever since.

Nothing changes on the outside until you change what is on the inside.


The Benefits Of Doing Inner Work

Inner work is just that, work. You can’t expect a walk in the park. But if you embark on the journey and commit to doing your inner healing work, what you gain from this life-long and often-times painful and emotional process is invaluable. 

  1. Self Acceptance – You learn to recognize your true strengths and weaknesses which help diminish self-criticism. You start to like and appreciate yourself more.
  2. Self Esteem – You learn to accept your own worth and expect fair treatment and respect from others. You no longer compromise in the way you allow others to treat you or in the way you treat yourself.
  3. Authenticity – You learn to let go of the “fake it til you make it” mentality. You become more real and keep it 100 just as you are.
  4. Courage – You dare to speak your own truths and march to the beat of your own drum. The pep in your step certainly changes for the better.
  5. Love – You develop a greater understanding, compassion and forgiveness toward yourself and toward others. You learn to give yourself grace and recognize that you are only human and make mistakes too and that the important thing is simply to learn from them.

Becoming The Most Authentic You

To become fully your most authentic self is the most satisfying and worthwhile thing you can ever do. You start to feel more alive, honest and real. You start to understand your heart, tap into your strength, your vulnerability and set out on a path to transform your life for the better.

Nothing changes on the outside until you change what is on the inside. When you choose to do your inner work, you are choosing healing, evolving, becoming happier, feeling free and stepping into your power. By committing to your own personal journey and personal growth, you are committing to getting in touch with who you are and what matters most to you. I can say hands down that choosing to do my inner work has certainly been one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life.

What will you do to  become a better version of yourself? Sound off in the comments and let me know.

I am Sandra, the gal behind SandrasDiary.com. Thanks for coming along with me on my journey. I'm trusting and enjoying the process and excited to be living my life out loud unapologetically. I currently reside in Brooklyn, NY.

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